Why didn't I blog? The answer is hidden somewhere between we were busy living, and I sometimes second guess myself -- what do I have to say that people would want to read about?
Today, I decided...since some people ask...some people must want to listen to me...if you don't...that's okay too...maybe tomorrow.
When I think back over the last five months and diabetes, I think 504 plans, starting high school, diabetes camp, New York City missions trip, switching pumps, changing the game plan with our service dog -- and I think -- someone has got to be going through the same things and seasons in life.
For that reason, today I write. It takes a village to raise kids, be healthy and happy, and especially do life with diabetes. Sometimes it's hard. Really hard. There isn't really an good alternative to not deal with diabetes. You deal. You find your grown up britches and you move on. Parents are kids with diabetes are tough -- and strong -- and fighters -- we learn everything we've got from our kids with diabetes -- not the other way around.
The other day, I read someone's post that said, "I feel sorry for them. (kids with diabetes) The hair on the back of my neck stood up as I pondered this thought. Sorry for them? Like pity party sorry for them? So I googled it....
Empathy is a noun and is defined as, “the ability to identify with or understand another’s situation or feelings.” For example,
- I have empathy for those families who lost their house in the storm. A tornado once destroyed my house.
- Having been late to work many times himself, the boss had empathy on the employee who was late.
Empathy is putting yourself in someone else’s shoes to understand that person’s situation. In the example above, the boss, having been late to work himself, had empathy for and understood why the employee was late for work.
Empathy is the newer of the two words, with its first use recorded in 1895. Sympathy, on the other hand, has a first recorded use in the late 1500s.
And the other word.....
Sympathy is a noun and is defined as, “a feeling of pity or sorrow for the distress of another.” For example,
- I offered my sympathy to the grieving mother.
- Their sympathy for the victims led them to donate.
So you can clearly see the difference between the two words. Sympathy is a compassion and sorrow one feels for another, but empathy is more focused around personally identifying with or projecting oneself into another’s situation.
You may feel bad for the person who was just laid off from their job, but if you have never been laid off yourself, you cannot have empathy for him or her. You can feel sorry, have compassion, and give them sympathy, but you can’t have empathy for their situation.
Which one would you use? Which one do you think I like better? Both are great words...describing similar feelings and responses to a situation -- like a person with diabetes. Here's my challenge -- it's hard to understand and feel the daily stress of diabetes if you don't have or live with diabetes. BUT -- if you work to educate yourself -- understand a little bit more than you did yesterday -- you can change your perspective from pity to empowerment. From sorrow to action and compassion.
Please don't feel sorry for the kids, especially my kid with diabetes (or any of them for that matter) Instead think of them as your action hero and what can you learn from them?
Please don't feel sorry for the kids, especially my kid with diabetes (or any of them for that matter) Instead think of them as your action hero and what can you learn from them?
